Father, forgive them

It’s very basic that Christians are to forgive those who offend against them. The scripture is very clear on this and in fact, warns us that if we do not forgive others, we will not be forgiven by God. (Matt 6;14).

If someone offends against us and later repents, we must forgive them 70 times 7 times if we are to claim the name, Christian. That is clear enough from the many scriptures given us in the bible.

What is not so clear is whether we must forgive those who have not and will not show remorse? One might notice the scarcity of direct teaching on this question and infer that we are obligated to forgive only in the case of an apology or repentance. If someone offends against me and won’t admit it or show any remorse, do I have to forgive him?

There are two arguments against withholding forgiveness when the offender is unrepentant.

The first argument was provided by Jesus on the cross when he said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” Even while his persecutors were in the act of taking His life, he forgave them. What more extreme case could you have for withholding forgiveness? And yet Jesus forgave.

The second argument has to do with our own attitude. We are so imperfect that I don’t believe it is possible for us to maintain an attitude of unforgiveness without it affecting our attitude. We are just too proud. Pride fosters unforgiveness because it keeps us from seeing our own shortcomings. The way for us to act is to realize our own shortcomings and just forgive. That is where grace is required. That is where humility is required. It takes no grace or humility to withhold forgiveness.

One of the best admonitions of scripture on this subject is given us by Paul who tells us, “And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.” (Eph 4;32).

In every thing

“In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.” (IThess 5:18)

It has always interested me that this admonition does not tell us to be thankful for only the good things. The “every thing” goes way beyond the good and takes in the setbacks, the defeats, the tragedies, the offenses we suffer.

How can this be? It sounds incredible, doesn’t it? How do we thank God for an accident that takes a child from us? Or a suddenly discovered cancer? Or a mugging that leaves us hospitalized? By faith.

There are many things that we will never understand this side of Heaven. But the more we know and trust God, the more willing we are to entrust Him with the fallout of the bad things that occur in our lives. With gritted teeth sometimes we have to say, “ We know that all things work together for good to them who love the Lord…” (Rom 8:28)

Many things that seemed to me a setback turned out to be a blessing with time. And some other things still seem like setbacks after years. But I believe that if it hadn’t been for some of the really hard times in my life, I would never have come to the intimate knowledge of God that is more precious than my life.  

Even if we don’t witness the good that emerges from the bad, we trust that God is doing what He only does, good.

Asunder

"What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." (Matthew 19:6)

It depends on how you calculate it but most estimates say that divorces are now about 50% of marriages in the U.S.  

But I’m amazed that it isn’t higher. After all, think about it. When you get married you really do not know what you are getting. And neither does your partner. None of us know what we will be like when the vastly diverse circumstances of life hit us, much less our new spouse. We all become someone different than who we were in our youth because of the events and things that happen to us. Death, illness, poverty, failure and even success, all make changes in us.

We all thought we were getting someone who would make our lives better. This will sound radical but I would argue that no marriages start with true love but rather a selfish love. That’s just human nature. In my opinion, no one gets married for what it can do for their partner. They get married for what it can do for themselves. Down deep, isn’t that the reality? And does that sound like real love?

Real love develops only as two people learn to put the other first. Real love is not a matter of emotion as much as it is a matter of the will. As we will to do best for our partner, real love begins to blossom.

What makes a marriage last is true love. But that true love is not emotion as much as it is the will for the other party’s well being. Then, as we put the other person first, our emotional part begins to kick in and in time, we find that we have a deeper feeling of love that overcomes all.

This is what makes marriage work.

My own heart has been broken for those in my family who have suffered so much in broken marriage. But I rejoice that they have learned God can use even this to change our lives for the better as we put Him first.

You are worthy

All intelligent and thoughtful people eventually and maybe frequently, come to the question of the real purpose in life. Yes, children and raising them right is important. Yes, doing the right thing is important. Finding satisfaction in work or career is important. Relationships, yes. Wealth, probably not. Fame, of course not.

In the final analysis, what is really the single, worthwhile goal in life is given to us in black and white from the words chorused by the 24 elders pictured in the last book of the bible. Their words say it all.

"Thou art worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honour and power: for thou hast created all things, and for thy pleasure they are and were created." (Revelation 4:11)

This passage tells us why we were created. For God's pleasure. Like it? Well, regardless, there it is.

How about measuring all our thoughts, words and deeds against that standard? Pretty much trashes a lot of what we do and our motives, doesn't it? What is really important is giving glory, honor and authority to our Creator.

Starting every day with a reminder of that standard would be a pretty good practice.

What, me worry?

The word of God is such a treasure house awaiting our claim upon its riches. This morning a passage from the book of Philippians arrested my attention again.

Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6-7)

The word "careful" here means full of care, or anxious. God's Word tells us to be anxious for NOTHING. The proper response to the onset of worry is to pray and put our issues before the Lord. Our Father knows we have difficulty controlling our emotions and feelings. But as a matter of the will, we can refuse to worry about the issue if we accept that God will undertake for us. We might not know how or when but we can depend on Him. This is the Christian antidote for worry and anxiety. Every time the issue re-surfaces, we just remind our heavenly Father that we have left this one with Him and then willfully focus our mind elsewhere.

What a wondrous thing and I have found that it works!

The mind is relieved as we simply apply this principle and we can have confidence that the Lord is in charge and will deal with all circumstances so much better than we ever could ourselves.